When I was growing up, there was very little discussion about sex. It absolutely wasn’t talked about at home and what I did learn at school or from friends I later discovered was distorted or wildly off base. I’ve consistently maintained an interest in helping people feel comfortable talking about sex. I know it isn’t always easy for some people because of gender or because of bad past experiences, because of sexual identity, or because they’ve felt wrong or ridiculed about being curious or different. Perhaps their experiences with sex have been scary, uncomfortable, confusing. People listen to other people who can share incorrect or biased opinions with no training behind what they’re saying. Very few people, if any at all, want to tell you they’re having erectile dysfunction, or they’re struggling with desire, or their sexual relationship is confusing, for example, so it’s easy to feel alone.
I became increasingly interested in sex therapy in a clinical setting through the trailblazing Dr. Rosie King. She talked about things at a time no one else in this country was discussing them, about sex and individuals and couples. I believed I could make a difference as well. Now I train and retrain in sex therapy with other remarkable educators, such as Martha Kauppi of The Institute for Relational Therapy, and Dr. Joe Kort, the founder of The Center for Relationship and Sexual Health. I’m as keen as ever to talk about sex with my clients, to educate people and couples, and to that end, I am always upgrading my skillset.
Why are desire issues hard to shift? Because desire sits at the intersection of and is dependent on numerous things working well – sexual, physical, emotional, intra-psychic, and relational, meaning how you feel and how your overall relationship itself is travelling. All of the above things are needed to be in relative harmony, and if your relationship is not in a good place, if there is a lack of harmony, such as poor communication and/or high conflict, disrespect, these tip the balance of closeness and connectivity to disconnection and self or partner-frustration. Macarthur Relationship Counselling offers comprehensive sex therapy for couples and individuals.
I work to help my clients improve their relationship and also their sexual function by providing a comfortable environment to aid discussion and sexual education about a number of issues. I understand that talking about sexual ‘problems’ or difficulties is not easy for many people because sex is seen as taboo or as a deeply private topic. My goal is to provide an empathetic and productive environment. To that end, I offer psychosexual education in an non-judgmental, confidential setting, empathising, validating, helping to normalise instead of stigmatising.
Some of the issues or topics we can address, depending on what’s happening with you, my client, include –
• Desire difference
• Willingness, and what that means
• Low libido, lack of sexual arousal
• Erectile dysfunction
• Premature ejaculation
• Delayed ejaculation
• Sex concerns as an older partner or person
• Painful sex
• Other sexual and relationship difficulties or worries
Sexual anxiety and issues often lead to conflict and relationship dissatisfaction. I can address both of these areas via relationship counselling and sex therapy.
If you are having worries or concerns about your sex life, about intimate connection with your partner. If you are worried about sex as an unpartnered person, sex therapy is available at Macarthur Relationship Counselling.
Phone Karen: 0416 665 165